Little White Redeyed Alzeid
by EaglefootMoonflightVipertail
Summary: Featuring Alzeid as Little Red Riding Hood, Baroqueheat as the Wolf, Razhel as a sleeping princess/hunter, and Soresta as the Giant. Contains failed randomness and humor. First time writing a humor story. Alzeid x Rahzel. Oneshot.


Little White Red-eyed Alzeid: Little Red Riding Hood: Alzeid The Wolf: Baroqueheat The Hunter:Rahzel The Grandma: Serateed.

Little White Red-eyed Alzeid was walking through the forest one day to his Grandmoth- I mean Grandfath- Actually it's more like an acquaintance's house. Anyway it was a perfect day since there was no wolves sneaking up on him, definitively not.

"Hey beautiful gorgeous la-!" The man who had wolf ears and a tail was met with a gun to his head. By the oh so sweet and kind Alzeid who was dressed up in a dress and a red cloak, with a basket full of sweets.

"I've told you before that I'm a guy! We do this every single day. When are you going to stop hitting on me!"

Baroqueheat, the wolf chuckled and lit a cigarette. "When you stop dressing up as a women, Al-boy."

"The only reason I have to dress like this is because that stupid Gran- acquaintance is a pervert like you!" Little White Red-eyed Alzeid walked on and following behind him was the wolf. Little Alzeid stopped. " Stop following me!" Alzeid shot at the Wolf but he only just dodged the bullets expertly since this was normal.

"You can't say that, Al-boy. My brother is your Grand-" Bang! "I mean acquaintance...and besides I want to see Rahzel-chan again!" The sly Wolf said.

"You know she's gonna kill you when she sees you right?"

"Yep! Just like always." The unlikely pair of Little White Red-eyed Alzeid and Baroqueheat the wolf. Found the cottage of the Gra- acquaintance.

Baroqueheat opened the door cheerfully as Alzeid sneaked in looking around warily. "Brother! We came to bring you some sweets!" He called out to find that the cottage was totally empty.

"Hey look at this." Little White Red-eyed Alzeid or LWRA for short looked down at a piece of paper that said 'Dear my sweet little Alzeid, Please take care of Rahzel. I'll be back soon. Love your Grandmother or Grandfather, Serateed. PS. Rahzel might try to climb the beanstalk.'

"STUPID CHICK!"

"Achoo! I think someone is coming to save me!" Rahzel said cheerfully being held in the hand of a giant by the name of, Soresta. "Now Mr. Giant how much will you pay for all the Alzeid maid merchandise?"

"THEY ARE NOT FOR SELL!"

"Oh really...then I guess you don't want all these pictures of Alzeid as little red riding hood..." Rahzel wave the pictures in front of the giant.

"I don't need those! I already have a collection of those in this picture book." He showed her a picture book that could probably take years to finish.

"Stalker..."

"I am not a stalker!" He stuffed Rahzel in a dollhouse full of Alzeid dolls.

"Hey! I'm not a doll you know! *sigh* At least I know Alzeid is coming." Razhel looked around at the Alzeid dolls. "You know this is really creepy but then at the same time it's cute! I am so gonna play a prank on him!"

"Stupid chick...getting...herself...kidnapped!" Alzeid said angrily climbing up the Beanstalk with Baroqueheat the wolf right behind him.

"Alzeid-chan-!"

"Don't you dare say something perverted, you pervert!" Alzeid said pointing his gun down at him.

"Oh no I wasn't going to. Let me just quote Rahzel-chan then. 'Alzeid is a lolita-ish, beautiful, towheaded girl.'"

"I am so killing you and the stupid chick later. Then I'm gonna take a very, very, very long nap." Alzeid continued to climb the beanstalk.

"Aw but Alzeid-chan you know you love me!"

"No I don't because you apparently tried to eat my Grand- acquaintance. Then Rahzel had to cut open your stomach because of it. And then when you healed Serateed had to kill you for coming close towards Rahzel. Then I had to kill you for being a idiot." Baroqueheat grinned not phased by the words.

"But you only killed me because of Razhel-chan right?"

"Why would I do that for that stupid chick?" Alzeid said with a light blush on his face.

"Cause deep down in your heart you actually love her!"

"Die!" Alzeid yelled pointing his gun at him, with a blush on his face.

"Big Sister!" Little Alzeid said hugging Rahzel.

"Little Alzeid? How did you get here?"

"The Giant grabbed me because I look like little brother. But it's not fair! Why does everyone like little brother more than me! I'm way cuter!" Little Alzeid pouted. Which Razhel thought was cute.

"But you are better then your brother."

"Really?"

"Yeah your cuter and not cold like he is."

"But which of us do you like?"

"Well...uh you see..." Razhel started stuttering and saying complete nonsense. "Uh...Both!"

Little Alzeid looked at her confused. "But-"

"Now why don't we play a prank on your brother?" Rahzel asked with a sly smile.

"Yay!"

"So this the Giant's castle. Kinda creepy isn't it?" Baroqueheat said seeing all the Alzeid merchandise everywhere. "Echo...echo...echo...echo...This is a pretty big castle."

"Fee fi fo fum I hear a Alzeid!" Soresta the Giant said in a booming voice that echo throughout the castle.

"Stupid Chick! Where are you!?" Alzeid shouted out never getting a response.

"In here!" Alzeid and Baroqueheat into a dollhouse before the Giant could find them.

"Little Alzeid what are you doing here?" Baroqueheat asked.

"That's not important right now! It's Rahzel she's in trouble!" Alzeid frantically made his way over to where Razhel laid on a bed. "We were going to pull a prank on you but then a spell went wrong and now she won't wake up."

"Well in these kinds of a situations the prince kisses the princess right?" Baroqueheat said slyly.

"No way! You will not kiss her!" Alzeid shouted out. The others stared at him in shock since that did not sound like him. His face heated up as he realized what he just said. "That's not what I meant! I just didn't want that preverted wolf to do anything to her..."

"Awwww Alzeid-chan is jealous. You look so cute blushing in that little dress."

"Shut up!" Alzeid sat down on the bed next to Rahzel. He lightly brushed away some hair from her eyes. His heart thumped loudly in his ears as he leaned down and got a few inches from her face. They were nose to nose. "Stupid chick...why do I have to always rescue you?.." He kissed her quickly but long enough to realize what he felt for her.

Just as he was about to move back and away from her. Arms wrapped around his neck and pulling him down to kiss her again. But this time she was kissing him back. His mind wasn't registering what was going on until he heard a snap and saw a flash.

Alzeid jerked back and saw Rahzel give him a devious smile and Little Alzeid was holding a camera. "Sweet Alzeid is so gonna get it when my dad sees that!" Rahzel said slyly.

Alzeid stood up with rage and ran after Little Alzeid and Rahzel. "Give that picture back!"

"Wait! Wait for me!" Baroqueheat running after them.

"Fee fi fo fum I see Alzeid!" The Giant said in a booming voice following them.

"This is fun! Hahahaha!" Rahzel laughed on the way down the Beanstalk.

As everyone including the stalker giant climbed on the Beanstalk. Fay a young boy whose best friend were scissors. Was passing by Razhel's house. "That sure is a big weed. Hmmmm..." He looked up at the beanstalk and down at his scissors. "Snip snip!" He said cheerfully as he cut down the Beanstalk.

Everyone came falling down the giant died on impact. And the others fell into a pile with Rahzel on the bottom with Alzeid, Little Alzeid, and Baroqueheat coming after.

"Rahzel!" Serateed grabbed her and hugged her really tight.

"Dad look what Alzeid did to me! A poor defenseless girl!" She the picture to her dad.

Let's just say he went crazy with blood lust. Fay, Little Alzeid, and Baroqueheat disappeared as Little White Red-eyed Alzeid was beat into a bloody pulp.

Razhel watched on feeling a little sadden by using Alzeid's feelings. _'Oh well at least I know he feels the same way.' _


End file.
